Waiting to Start Living

I want the future
I exist in the present
yet I project my mind on to what is to come
waiting for the moment when I can be in the now, more often than not
In time the now will manifest in various ways at various times
becoming more frequent
until it happens often enough that my moments of lack
are few and far between
Until then I must stop waiting

My Allegory

In my mind I have often wondered who I am
Through a myriad of angles I piece together my allegory
Just as I have it fit,
some new equation
some pontification comes in
and I am inclined to start again
Seeking perfection,
the perfect union of I and myself
But I never change
I the observer
I the witness
This life is merely a vehicle
A wild horse to be tamed
A Lucid experiment on reality
Dreams manifest expectations
For the two are one
Under the sun
Where the phoenix rises
As many times as seen fit

Vein

I wish I knew where I was headed
I try to follow my thoughts intended brain in tangles toiled and fretted
By what is true and what's pretended
When will my soul be mended
my heart un-leaded
My time is lent
My money spent
And I'm indebted
to my own intentions

Floating

holding to the motion
feeling with desire I will be
swimming in the ocean
looking at the stars
reflect my infinite devotion
to Jupiter and Mars
and every thing that is just a notion
to me it is on fire
My home, my pyre
Far on the horizon
Fading

Deleted

delete is a powerful thing
in the new world of digits it brings
instant destruction
of scribbled constructions
no longer a chance to stream
consciousness ripped at the seams
with backspace delete
no chance to repeat
goodbye to the wastebasket dreams

Presumptions

Lost to far in my head to fathom
Somewhere between a ditch and a chasm
Digging up playthings and putting them down
Order them up from the underground
and exercise the presumptions

The words of black and red
The sinner out of my head
The crusty flesh is bread
The wine is better in bed

A daydream snatched into the dark of night
What once was natural expelled from light
Instinct plus enlightenment the devil strikes
Hide your desire
Or be lured you to the fire
Pray to the spire
The Devil's a liar
Gods empire
will save you
I mean enslave you
I mean uh, praise you
You found the answer in Christ
all your lusty thoughts could never suffice
against the power of almighty poltergeist
I mean the son of god
The lamb for the slaughter
Is never good enough for the lamb of the fodder
I mean the father, shit, why can't I get this right
Inexorably driven by my appetite
If it feels good, it's right
Good night

Myism rules

Most people are elitists
For the ones who claim they aren't, that's just an opinion
(or a deception)

Elitism is the idea that you and "your people" know best, are best
Or maybe it's just you.
Whether you label yourself an elitist or hang the name on "others", you are an elitist.
no one is one with humankind, reptilekind, Plantkind, nothingkind just one.
we are all just beings.
surviving
fighting for time and space
you can convince yourself otherwise
Pray, meditate all you want
Ultimately, if you think you are not an elitist, and other people are. . .
You are in effect putting yourself above them
Or beside them, away from them
It is human nature to segregate (especially when times get tough)
but whatever you're opinion
consider your ethics before you spout your elitism
Or consider your elitism before you spout your ethics
HUBRIS KILLS